UNMANAGEABLE

But there was a time
When I was torn between decisions,
Which seemed wrong,
And tempted by choices,
Which felt irrestible.
Lost in the maze, oblivious to the enigma,
Unable to decipher the hieroglyphics,
Overlooking the secret guideposts,
Illiterate to the right way,
Stumbling about blindly in the daily labyrinth,
My emotions were four times as big as me.
I just never knew how to maneuver.
I asked the people.
Only to be told opinions that weren’t mine,
Shown directions, I couldn’t really follow.
Times were full of regret and remorse,
As if my life could have been easier and better -
If only I’d known then what I saw later.
It was revealed in glimpses,
Relief could be had intermittently.
When I look on attentively, refrain from judgment,
Invite it all in as it unfolds - with playful welcome -
I am granted joyful equanimity,
Even in the midst of upheaval.
Those are the golden days,
Enchanted moments lift me out
To the magic that is forever available
If only I can remember to look up.
Is all.