If You’re Working a Good Program, You Probably WON’T Say …

I’m better than you and I want to be dead. – quote, David

I’m gonna do what I did my whole life. There is no Higher Power over me. – quote, Nina

:: Self-obsession feedback loop:
1) I’m FUCKED! Why didn’t I… ?? Why did I… ??
2) It’s too late! I’m too old, ugly, fat, tall, stupid. I fried my brain.
3) Yes, but not now!
4) I should remember everything. I should be smarter, make no
5) I need some dope while I’m kicking.
6) I don’t like people. They are ugly, stupid, and mean.
7) I’m an outsider. No one likes me here.
8) I need work, I need an income, I’m working too much, I shouldn’t
have to work so hard, I should be rich.
9) I should have bought a retirement plan.
10) OMG!! There’s SOMETHING wrong with … fuck! Fuck! FUCK!!
11) Why don’t I come from a nice big family, the kind that opens doors?
12) I can’t do it! I don’t wanna! I shouldn’t have to! I can’t change!
13) You don’t get me! Why don’t you… ? Where were you? Where are you?
14) I’m SO sorry that I cause suffering. It’s just… I don’t wanna suffer…
15) I imagine bad things and it freaks me out.
16) It’s ALL about me and it’s ALL your fault!
17) Whatever it is… I’m AGAINST it!
18) Life sucks! YOU suck!
19) I NEED him (her) NOW!!!
20) … I’m fucked! It’s too late!
:: Return to 1)

"Selfishness - self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate." – quote, AA big book, pp 62